Saturday, May 10, 2014
Sometimes life throws us so much shit that we have little choice but to retreat into our heads. We keep people away, at arms length in the vain hope that they can't reach us.
I do this. I crave understanding and interaction, but I do not want to be put down or used. I remain aloof and even hostile to the idea of being around others.
A friend of mine told me that in his younger years, he retreated into such a logical being that people thought he was Mr. Spock. He learned to protect himself from painful memories by denying the pain entirely. Though no one can keep such a defense up forever, it''s a very valid strategy for survival.
Later, after he regained an emotional life, he experienced the Supertramp song "Logical" at a talent show. The words made him cry at the memory of his experiences.
Questions run so deep, for such a simple man. I know it sounds absurd but please tell me who I am. These deep questions inspire a deep longing for connection. Both to others and to one's own inner self.
Though I have never met my friend, I feel he's a kindred spirit on the path to self awareness.
Did you have a logical phase? How did it help you get over pain? What songs make you break down into puddles just thinking about them?
Kind comments encouraged.